Lucky

IMG_0361

Lucky 5/5/17

 

Maybe I got lucky

Maybe I got an edge

Don’t know if that means anything

Or if it helps me get along

What seems to mean something

Can be completely wrong

And you think you can count on it

Put your eggs in the basket

But the basket might be gone

For no reason

With no warning

Upside down

Your world

Or maybe the entire world

Is not listening any more

No symbiotic exchange

Dialog gone

Where were you anyway
Making sense

In-between exchanges

Feeling my way through this

Figuring out an accumulative effect

Of my family and friends

The atmosphere and the moon tonight

All of the rain lately

That I love so much

Feeding my disposition

But enough is enough

When the sun came out today

There was a golden glow

And a light happiness

I could not deny

The crucial fragility

Inside the dark and foreboding

Baby back inside

Inspire me, delight me

I’ll beckon you oh beguiling one

Out in the field or in the streets

Wayward winds changing

Pulling me towards my desire

Let’s see what develops

And see what song we’ll sing next

Space 1/8/17

Space 1/8/17

Debra_Space.jpg

Nobody would complain if we heard that one more time

Because it’s good. It’s really good

There’s no denying it

I just have the feeling sometimes that I think it’s time to move on

And I just can’t listen to it one more time

At least not right now

The pulling and the mourning

For things gone too fast

Only now living in the memory

Unable to put it to bed at last

But there are those times

When I played a song for an entire day

I wanted it to encapsulate every cell of my being

Swim in it

Or the times I counted when I walked

Just so I wouldn’t think

Because sometimes thinking is just too much

There is a dark hole between thinking and feeling

Or maybe 1000 doors

That may or may not be locked

Infinite variables, uncertain outcome

Grabbing my hand to run

Maybe you never thought of it

Never crossed your mind

Processing is so inherent and diverse

It is good though to be able and to stop

Catch your breath

Feel your breath

So, you can even hear the words when they come

Or hold the pen to write

Needing to make space and listen

Feel the rhythm of my own body

Finding my way in the universe

Listening’s

Listening’s 10/23/16

Claire_And_Kirsten.jpg

You can know anyone

The world is smaller and bigger

All at the same time

Where sometimes you must get in line

And others you must lead

Out into the sunshine

Or behind closed doors

I listen. I’m listening

Trying to feel my body again

Trying to find my mother

Who’s receding behind the curtain

In touch and out of touch

Operating from another place

Same face, different eyes

I’ll carry you there

I’ll remember. I know you

Listening’s. Listening to talking

Thinking

Winding it up and down

Even though I can’t touch your hand

I can get to know you more everyday

Makes everything else fade away

Is the task important

The doing of it

The most simple process

That consumes

Not sure how to manage it

Does the tail in fact wag the dog?

Can it sleep or is it consumed in obsession?

What becomes you

How much of everything is everything

I’m finding tiny lines

And falling in huge cracks

Still me. Flowing

Feeling the same

In a river of my own destiny

Requesting permissions

And ready access

I build and reframe

But I remain intact

Humanly human

Softly, sweetly singing

What is only natural

And part of my eventual process

Sure, it is a circle

And not a straight line

Exploring the curves

To find my mind

 

BLESSED

IMG_3124

BLESSED 7/30/16

 

All of it invaded every corner of your life

Maybe it was no invasion but only the thread holding it all together

 

Waiting for a moment of silence that never comes

Off the edge of the page and out into the wilderness

 

Perspective creates the freedom or the prison

I’m trying to find the pause amongst the chaos

 

Structure and sentiment, heartfelt investment

Do I really have anything to say? Media carnival

 

Finding the music. The paper and pen

Like I’ve heard said, the words will come. You have to be there to catch them

 

Over occupied and never alone

Endless bombardment of thoughts and images, a symphony of life in the background

 

How do you put your finger on it? At which point is it part of you?

Making it hard to find your voice

 

Trying to navigate, investigate and associate

Waiting for it to whisper in my ear

 

Laundry’s going down there and the floors still need to be cleaned

Somehow I just had to stop

 

That wheel can never let you go. But if not now, when?

Don’t hesitate, go. Sleepy devilish destination.

 

Relentless indecision coaxing fear and stagnation

Desperately trying to breathe in anywhere

 

One chance and it’s gone

How many years of continuance left you numb and less grateful

 

Now on the other side of half

Every and all, magnified and intense. I’m fleeting

 

Listening, catching the once in a lifetime

Ceaselessly knocking at my door

 

Never looking back with remorse and regret

I hold life’s moments dear and reach out being blessed

Stopping To Notice

 

vince and me

Stopping To Notice 12/1/15

 

All I had to do….was hear the first three notes

Transferred back. Taken back.

Every moment and words on your tongue

Stuck and begun

Within the deep recesses

How to touch that

What is that connection

Of everything and all of it

That ever meant anything

All the same thing

Resting in that quiet pool

That waits to be reawakened

Stirred and such

Yes.

Beckoning.

Reckoning

Blown away in the windy day

Out on a fall day

In the leaves you love so much

And the smell of what might become

Feeling the tension of what could not be

How do you know me

The soft inside

I couldn’t hide from you

Or anyone who asked nicely

I just wanted to know

A little bit of everything

And find a little bit of quite in my heart

Sometimes the compassion

Even though loosely aimed

Completely consumed my soul

Still does

Still does

Not sure how you get around it

Or if you even should

I think I need a little more wine

Fingers moving and I’m missing you

Missing everything I don’t do

Why I don’t find the space

For the only thing that was ever important

Keep it on the outside

With the everyday circle

Of endless and ever coming

Which in the end is all that really matters

What you did with the day to day

If you touched and held it

Or left it in the dark

I just wanted a little bit

Of my soul resting in that spot

Of the music

And the words and my heart

All one and the same

Maybe the sun is shining

Might be dark

But knowing that it all comes together

You feel, hear, know and be

How it is that you are here

I know

It’s every part of all and every year and moment I ever was at once

Lately

I sense it

Never, never, never,

Stop long enough to absorb it

Well

Now

And it’s ahhhh

Why We Fell In Love At All 12.20.80

Thinking we could make it. Knowing we almost did. I want to know your touch and still something pulls me away. How can a person fall out of love? Or, does love simply change? Maybe we’re just wiser and maybe could we share again? What about you tore me apart? What about me made you cry? Trying all we could. It just shouldn’t have been. So hard. Wrong places, wrong times. All the harsh words and even lies. Doesn’t sound like love to me. Doesn’t it make you wonder why we ever fell in love at all?

Sometimes you're just in-between.
Sometimes you’re just in-between.

Oatmeal

12/22/2000. She began to feel ordinary and predictable. Like a bowl of oatmeal everyday. The fine line between reality and fantasy. Blurred. No. It is what it is I cried. And what, may I ask, is that?

12/27/2000. You could never handle me. Sitting above your head. Just an apostrophe. Maybe you excused me instead. I never wanted your intentions. My best inventions could not protect me. Everything grows in here. Nothing remains unchanged.

A moment by the lake
A moment by the lake

A Very Cool Dog

Yesterday I met some friends at the Ale Emporium to wish a friend who is moving goodbye. When we went in the front door, there in the entrance, was a dog. She stayed there most of the night. Even after 100’s of people were there. She just watched and listened. Right before I left I went out to pet her. She loved it. Then we played with her ball a little too. She really seemed wise. Had a look in her eye like a person. I asked one of the regulars about her. Some of it I understood and some not. It was evidently the restaurant owner’s dog. It was a girl and it had the most interesting name taken from biblical history. Wish I could remember it. I got quite a story. Very surreal. 

 

What An Interesting Face
 
 
I’m Getting Sleepy
 
 
Just Chillin
 

The Simplest Of Shots

Another shot of yesterday’s stacked, open faced sandwich. Only 3 elements. Basically. Sandwich on plate, tea in mug and placemat. I think getting in closer would be fun. To the point where things become abstract shapes. You have to struggle a little to tell what it is. I will try that soon.

I like the simple composition in this shot.